I’m sorry, the moment you hear someone with a voice that sounds like this guy put your hand in your pocket over your wallet and do not let go till you haven’t seen him for 10 or more min.
When you move your hand your credit cards are all sevens
Local house witch telling you to please learn basic housekeeping skills.
It’s not your fault if no one ever taught you but YouTube is a magical place and can teach you at your own pace.
Someone asked me what housekeeping skills I’d recommend learning.
Keep in ming that this is not me shaming you, I know you have your reasons, folks. This is just a guy who enjoys clean spaces asking that you start learning now.
Here’s what I suggest as an adult who has lived with other adults who didn’t have housekeeping skills:
First and foremost, learn about all the places in your house that need to be cleaned and understand how often they should be cleaned. the American Cleaning Institute (I guess that’s a thing) has a good article about basic cleaning info. Plus this video on cleaning tips is great!
Also, you don’t have to use fabric softener and you shouldn’t use it on towels or any fabric meant to absorb. (Learn about laundromats) And please learn how to clean out your dryer vent, it’s a safety hazard!
Get a disinfecting cleaner for your high-touch areas, especially the gross ones like the bathroom. Just because it doesn’t look dirty, doesn’t mean it’s clean!
I turn 30 next month so here’s what I learned in my 20s:
—don’t work for startups, they’re always one ‘innovative idea’ away adding ‘sell your kidneys on the black market’ to your job description.
—keeping a collection of basic OTC medicine on you will save your life one day. I recommend Advil, Imodium, and TUMS.
—those little single-use glasses cleaning wipes are 1000% worth the money
—overly self-depreciating jokes just make people uncomfortable, wean yourself off of them
—you can buy dehydrated mini marshmallows in bulk online and they’re a godsend for hot cocoa
—people don’t care if you have fidget toys on your desk they just want to play with them
—try to go to bed BEFORE the existential ennui kicks in
Also drink water and eat a plant
This is all GREAT. I turned 40 last week, so permit me to add what I learned in my 30s:
keep on not working for startups
sometimes there comes a point where the thing (fandom, hobby, friendship, romantic relationship) you loved no longer brings you joy. And that’s okay. Try to mourn the loss, take joy in the memories, and don’t burn any bridges in case ten years go by and you find yourself back in that fandom/hobby/relationship again
it turns out that (ugh) moderate regular exercise is (spit) good for you. The sooner you make it part of your life, the easier it’ll be
related: if you throw yourself into a new exercise regime too hard and too fast, without stopping to rest or consider whether a particular move is good for you … well, shoulder injuries are painful and consults with orthopedic surgeons are expensive
knees are bastards too
don’t even get me started on ankles
there may come a time when your digestive system is too fragile for ibuprofin. I’m sorry
one day you’re gonna wake up and realise you no longer give any fucks about some things that used to bother you
on the other hand, you might be alarmed to realise what you still give a fuck about
never get down on the floor without an exit strategy for getting back up
I turn 50 this year. what I have learned in my 40s:
“loving yourself” is less of a feeling and more of an action. you can start doing it any time and it will make your life better and better as you go on
this will happen incrementally - be patient
along those lines, if you haven’t started making an active effort to quit shit-talking yourself, suck it up and do it
no, shut up. do it. “but it’s haaaaard!” don’t care. do it.
whether you like it or not, you are mortal and you need to go to the doctor for an annual checkup
stretch regularly - your future self will thank you
at some point you will encounter people much younger than you arguing passionately and incorrectly about history you personally remember and experienced
this will be infuriating and annoying
otoh, most other things just… will not matter to you as much
at some point you will shift from wanting to go out to being like “eh” and deciding to stay in. this is okay.
you will have absolutely no idea what The Youth are talking about and you will not care
but if you keep your mind open to new ideas you’ll never be irrelevant
your company still doesn’t love you - don’t give them more than they pay you for
get a fucking hobby, especially a hobby that involves physically creating/handling something and/or moving your body in physical space. it will do you more good than you can imagine
Just turned 60 and let me say:
Find joy, every kind, it’s always worth it
I’m talking that massive, never-ending Discord chat with your bestie? The one that makes you giggle through the day? It’s not a “waste of time,” it’s what time was made for
If that’s fanfic for your favorite characters who never even met on screen celebrate that!
If that’s building a tiny fleet of snake villagers for your snake town and they just cover your mantel hell yes!
If that’s collecting pillows and making a fort of them every weekend I’ll be right over
Feeling and sharing joy is the whole point
This is too tempting…, so, I’m 74, and: don’t fund startups
Please keep stretching and exercise enough NOT to need an elaborate strategy to get up from the floor. IT MAY SAVE YOUR LIFE
Say bye to your employer as early as you possibly can, unless you really love your job. You won’t be sorry.
Keep doing the annual checkups 🙏🏼
Enjoy that fucking hobby you’ve acquired in your 50, or find something new. Do try new things & adventures.
doomsday preppers always keeping rusty tins of food in their basement but never building springhouses and smokehouses and paddocks for future livestock 🤨 those canned peaches are only going to bring you so far babe
are you going to study medicinal herbs and their cultivation or are you just going to keep stockpiling weapons like a little bitch 😩
going to shoot your way out of an infected cut, dumbass?
From the thumbnnail I thought that it was just a jacket thrown over a box that the kitty had made himself comfortable on. I was NOT expecting the tiny little defeated voice to emerge.
